Although I truly did think that most people were already well aware of how the misuse of Social Media could make or break a job application or even threated the job itself, it appears that a lot of folks still aren’t taking it seriously.
Surely by now we’ve all heard of the terrible injustices done to this or that waitress or waiter who “tweeted” something negative about a customer or boss or whomever and then lost their jobs. I’m sure that people feel passionately one way or another about it.
As someone who has worked for many years with people – younger and older – about career choices, applying for jobs, development resumes and cover letters, and coaching them in preparation of their job interviews – I feel compelled to chime in on this topic.
It was after reading a variety of “tweets” and Facebook updates that made me think, “Wow, this person has no idea how he/she looks right now… I sure hope his/her boss isn’t seeing this on line! How embarassing!”
So, in the interest of doing my little part in bringing a friendly reminder to job seekers to be careful what they tweet and otherwise write about, I bring you my article on how Social Media Can Affect Your Career in my Career and Job Resources section. Please read – and comment – by Clicking => HERE.
Because, let’s face it – if we were all 100% successful achieving our goals and objectives 100% of the time, WHY are there so many books, audios, seminars, workshops, programs, products, potions, and lotions on the market today?
Because, it makes sense to say that we SOMETIMES FAIL at reaching our goals.
Now… that does NOT mean we are “failures.” I think it’s safe to say that there is a BIG DIFFERENCE between EXPERIENCING a failure and BEING a failure.
It’s kind of like taking a test in school. If you don’t do well in ONE test, that doesn’t mean you fail the entire course. Naturally, we could go on about this, and agree that if you continue to fail every test… well, you probably WILL fail the course. 🙂
But that does NOT mean YOU are a failure.
There are a lot of reasons why people fail to achieve specific goals or objectives. Actually, I wouldn’t be surprised to see that there was an entire library of books on the subject. Right off the top of my head, I can think of a few reasons why I, myself, have failed at reaching a few goals in my life:
- I THOUGHT I really wanted the goal, but it turned out I didn’t…
- I lost momentum after a “failure…”
- I felt I lacked the skill…
- I felt I didn’t have the support I needed…
And it could go on. If you are honest with yourself, you should be able to ASK YOURSELF: “Why am I not making the type of progress I want to make?” And after you ask yourself – quiet your mind and LISTEN to what your heart says. It could be any number of reasons. Oftentimes, our “reasons” are more “excuses” than actual reasons.
I’m intrigued by this topic, and am going to be writing more about it in the future. I feel it is a fairly complicated topic, and certainly don’t mean to gloss over it with a platitude such as “Oh, You can do it! I know you can!” There HAS to be more to achieving goals than that.
For starters, I just wrote a bit more on what I feel is one of the BIG reasons why we sometimes fail to achieve goals and objectives at my article here => Do You Ever Fail to Achieve Goals and Objectives? Please read it, and let me know what YOU think!
In the meantime, I’ll be exploring this more in future posts, because I really think it’s an important subject for anyone honestly working towards personal development.
I have always enjoyed learning from various popular self development teachers. I can be at a yard sale, and can spot a personal development book like an eagle spots his next meal from 1/2 mile up in the air.
Even if it’s a self development author I don’t particularly resonate to, I find myself picking up the book anyway. I can’t seem to help it!
There are times when I seem to pick up a book, and wonder, “What the heck am I doing with this thing? I am not a fan of his…” But I now realize that in almost every single book I find, I also uncover at least a small nugget of gold.
Here’s an example.
A couple of months ago, I found some books by Dr. Phil McGraw. Now, I confess that I had NO IDEA as to who Phil McGraw really was except that he was associated w/ Oprah Winfrey. But, I bought the books anyway. And lo and behold – as I sat down to read through some of the book, I found myself amazed at a story he told about a time when Oprah was being sued by some Texas cattlement for comments she had made pertaining to Mad Cow Disease around 1998. Evidently, Oprah just could not understand the obvious injustice of the attacks on her.
And her preoccupation about the injustice of it all was weakening her spirit. And, in order to face this multi-million dollar lawsuit – just or injust – she needed to be 100% present for it.
So, what struck me was Dr. Phil’s insistence that Oprah look at her situation realistically – and of course, this means we ALL look at our situations realistically. Instead of bemoaning “why” things are happening to us, he illustrated that we accept our situation and DEAL with it. I thought about the times I have spent in my life wondering, “How can this be? Why me? What did I do to deserve this?” etc.
But when I read Dr. Phil’s words that day, it really struck me as to how much time I have wasted in my own life, thinking of things that cannot be changed by worrying or stressing or avoiding them.
So, as it turns out, there are numerous gold nuggets in that book, and I’m holding onto it for now.
We can all learn from others. I feel fortunate to have stumbled onto many wonderful resources that I enjoy sharing. If you would like to see a little more here on my blog, including a list of author events from Hay House authors that you might enjoy, please see the article here: Hay House Author Events
I was inspired to talk a little about the concept of Giving and Receiving after reviewing Part 4 of The Master Key System by Charles F. Haanel.
I really love to give gifts. For some reason, I love the whole action of thinking of what someone might enjoy, and then going through the process of procuring the gift.
And the gifts I give aren’t always of monetary or material value – sometimes they involve food. 🙂 For example, when I was growing up, every Christmas season I would don a little red & green plaid pinafore that I used as an apron, and start baking chocolate chip cookies.
I made DOZENS of these chocolate chip cookies. Then, I would carefully arrange them on paper plates, and walked over to various neighbors’ houses and give them all away (well… ok, I kept a FEW for our own family).
I had so much fun doing this. I never did it with any expectation of receiving anything back. The warm feeling I had inside my heart always seemed to be enough.
Even though I’m not a kid anymore, I still do this! Even down in South Carolina where I am wintering as I write this post, I did it. I am staying in a condominium complex where there aren’t a lot of residents, I have gotten to know the staff here. So I baked for all of them!
Anyway, I wrote a little bit on the topic of giving and receiving. Please click here to read my article => On Giving and Receiving as Inspired by Charles F Haanel and The Master Key System I hope you enjoy the article!
Do you every feel like you need help overcoming procrastination? If so, you are DEFINITELY not alone!
Please believe me when I tell you that this particular little demon has been one that I have extensive personal experience with. 🙂 My dad has also admitted to me that he procrastinates. Sometimes we joke around about it, “Never put off today what you can put off tomorrow,” or, “Seize the day, tomorrow.”
I love the tagline at www.Procrastinators.org – “Productivity is Overrated.”
But while overcoming procrastination may not be a serious issue for some – it is practically crippling for others.
Especially for those who need to produce results on deadlines, for anyone who has to reach sales or productivity quotas, for students who need to finish their homework, for the parent who promised to bake cookies for the school event, for those who are self employed … you get the idea. It can be an obstacle for just about anyone.
Sometimes, it doesn’t really seem like procrastination is all that harmful (especially when people joke about it so much…).
But consider, for a moment, being the parents who put off baking the cookies for their kids’ school event. What kind of message are the parents sending the kids?
Or, how about the self-employed entrepreneur? If you happen to be self-employed – whether it’s in a bricks and mortar business or in an internet based marketing business – you may have heard the old saying:
“The great thing about being self-employed is that no one tells you what to do. The bad thing about being self-employed is that no one tells you what to do.”
So, as it turns out, overcoming procrastination is actually rather important, isn’t it?
Again, I’m not saying that the occasional bout is anything to worry about – but if it starts getting in the way of seeing positive results in your life, guess what? Then it’s a problem or obstacle that needs to be addressed.
I came up with a couple of ideas about overcoming procrastination, and I have posted the article right here on my blog!
This is a technique I have used myself (Remember… I have needed to really work on overcoming procrastination myself !)
Have a look here => Overcoming Procrastination – An Important Key to Your Success
As always, I would love to hear YOUR ideas!
I just watched Gary Ryan Blair’s (aka “The Goals Guy”) video for his 100-Day Challenge called “Time is Money.” This particular video – it’s not real long – just a few minutes – is almost scary.
No. Scratch that… It IS scary. The reason WHY it is scary is because it is true. Everything he talks about – the fact that there is one resource in the world that is NOT for sale, and NOT for exchange, and NOT able to be bartered.
That resource is TIME.
The scary thing is, it is also one of the easiest things to waste. And I know I’ve done my share.
Please click on my article here to watch the video: Life Success Strategies Truth – Time is Money. See if you don’t agree with what Gary talks about. If you don’t – I would certainly like to know your view. Maybe you can convince me that I should not be concerned about how I spend (or waste) my time.
I wouldn’t mind a good excuse… 🙂
Again, the video is right here on my blog: Life Success Strategies Truth – Time is Money.
The most unlikely muse for a self development blog entry was a fairly recent memory of my experience involving an incident with scissors and my hair.
Usually, like most ordinary folk, I pay someone to cut my hair. My hair is rather unremarkable and simple to cut.
It takes the average stylist approximately 5-10 minutes to trim up my hair, which is so fine, that when wet, lies plastered flat against my head that you can practically see all the bumps and curves.
I estimate that it takes about the same time for the stylist to cut my husband’s hair.
What has continually irked me is that I get charged AT LEAST $5-$10 more for the cut than my husband gets charged. “Because ladies’ cuts are more complex,” is one reason I’ve been given.
But I don’t buy it. Because how difficult is it to cut a straight line? My hair is straight, so fine that all of it can be grasped in a baby’s fist – and frankly, three good swipes with the shears oughta do it.
Or so I thought.
For several years, I had wanted to experiment with cutting my own hair. The last straw was when I went to a stylist down in (town which will not be named) in South Carolina, and asked if she could give me a quick trim.
No wash, no styling, no blow-dry – just a couple of quick cuts to get those dead ends off.
She was done in less than 5 minutes. In fact, I hardly noticed any hair on the floor.
Which was interesting.
When I asked how much – expecting her to say, “ oh, let’s call it $5…” maybe even “$8…” – she said, “That’ll be $15.”
I hid my surprise, and handed her a $20 bill.
Expecting her to give me some change.
She gave me a funny look when I kept my wallet open, so, with some embarrassment, I told her to keep the change (which was already in her pocket.).
So, when I went home, I asked my husband how it looked. With a somewhat quizzacle look, he asked “How does what look?” (Emphasis on “what.”)
I said, “My hair!”
He did not notice. He asked, “How much did that cost?” (Emphasis on “that.”)
I told him. It was at that moment I resolved to cut my own hair next time.
The “next time” came a few nights later. It was about 11:00 pm, and I had the courage to pick up the scissors. I had been picturing the look I was after for a long time, so I tipped my head forward, grasped the hair in my hand and hacked away.
When I looked in the mirror, I was pleased.
Until morning, when the light was better.
I saw that the back had a line of a partial cut going from the right side, a little slanted down toward the middle of the back of my head, where the cut abruptly stopped – and the rest of what was left hung below that cut.
“Layered!” I thought. “I inadvertently layered my hair!” But the problem was, it was only layered on one side of my head. And there was absolutely NO WAY that I could replicate what I had done the night before. At 11:00 pm.
The only thing left to do was to shower and wash my hair, then blow dry it, and curl it up into a sassy flip (which I did, and which hid the slash mark).
Fortunately, my hair grows faster these days than it did when I was a kid – but, the fact of the matter is, at some point I knew I had to go to a stylist and get it cut again.
Which I did.
And the stylist looked with interest at the last cut, and said something like, “Hmmm. And it looks as though we went with a partial layering last time, did we?”
At which point, I had to either ‘fess up, or lie.
And as much as I don’t always care for ‘fessing up, I despise lying – because that is just not me.
Picture me saying in a breezy and carefree tone of voice, “Oh, yes! You noticed! Thank you darling! We discussed the matter at some length prior to committing to this trend-setting cut – but, frankly, I’ve tired of the style, and would like to once again try the straight cut…”
Of course it wouldn’t work. Fortunately, I was far away from home, where no one who sees me on a day-to-day basis would really notice.
And that whole story, of course, brings me to the point of this post. Now what (you may be asking yourself) does this whole ridiculous story have to do with self development strategies?
Well, not a whole lot at first glance. But, the whole idea of “cutting corners” (a little pun, given the hair cut theme) is actually rather critical in life.
For example, sure, you can say, “Well, I need to do some work on my goals, but I don’t really need to write them down…” (a tad related to my own sorry little tale… Because NOT writing down your goals is cutting an important corner.).
Or, “I want to get some personal development training, but why should I pay someone to help me when there’s so much for free on the internet?” (Answer – again – related to my decision to cut my own hair and save money… “Because you get what you pay for!”)
Or, perhaps you just need to buckle down and just do what the self-development experts advise, and use proven methods of getting the job done and achieving your goals – and getting them done correctly the first time instead of attempting to reinvent the wheel, cutting corners, or trying to get something for nothing.
One look at my lovely home done haircut would have convinced you! And no, I am NOT posting a photo… 🙂
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I sometimes think we acquire certain personal development skills and habits in such subtle ways that we don’t always remember WHEN we began using them – WHERE we learned them, and HOW we knew that they were important to our personal growth to begin with!
The idea of writing about personal development skills and habits we have acquired came to me this morning as I found myself thinking about a daily ritual I have.
Well, actually, I have a LOT of daily rituals – but this one always stands out, because it is one of the very first things I do every morning without fail.
When I rise, I go to the kitchen, cut open a lemon and ream the whole thing – juice AND pulp – and add a full glass of water. Drinking that full 10 – 12 ounce glass of lemon water (unsweetened) is the first thing that I do every day.
I began thinking about this activity, and why I do it:
- It is fresh citrus – so that’s a nice refreshing addition to the diet right there.
- It makes me feel like I’ve done something good for me straight away, before any other activities of the day crowd my plate.
But first, I have to say that I cannot think of one single area of my own life where I am not consciously working on improvement.
And I realize that this is part of my life’s work which will continue until the time comes when I leave this earth.
That’s because it is a task that can never be completed. If I’m not acquiring actual personal development skills – then I’m certainly working on creating good habits and routines that lead to further self growth!
Some of the practices and activities that I introduced into my own life have become wonderful habits and routines as a result!
…habits and routines that I just KNOW contribute to my overall well-being.
Getting back to my daily morning lemon water:
I can honestly count on one hand the number of days over the last 12 – 15 years where I have NOT begun my day with this drink!
Somewhere along the line (but I cannot remember when or where), I read that this was good for the body. I then discovered that it felt wonderful to have this first thing in the morning. So, I continued it and still do – to this day.
Sometimes we’ll add orange to the mix, but we ALWAYS have the lemon!
I don’t even think about it any more (except when we’re running low on lemons and we have to go buy another bag…)
Another thing that I do every single day is meditate/pray and review certain affirmations. It was a learned skill – and now I do it without thinking.
That’s just the start. The many things that I do each day were NOT the result of one single “ah ha” moment – or some drastic decision or action on my part.
I do know that I am continually looking for additional good habits to further improve my life.
I want to hear from YOU!
What I would like to know now is what YOU began to do as part of your own path that has since become a happy and healthy habit. Would you be willing to share your thoughts and experiences?
I hope so! Please leave your ideas and thoughts below so we can compare notes and learn from one another!
PPS: I’ll be adding articles pertaining to personal development skills and habits as I continue to build the site – and will post articles here at my Healthy Living Tips page, as well as at my Life Strategies for Success page (among other pages that I think up as I go along!) 🙂 Thanks for reading!
If you are a member of my Self Development Strategies newsletter, you may recognize the information in the following post from one of my newsletters.
The inspiration for this topic comes from Part 8 of Charles F. Haanel’s famous The Master Key System – an early self-development correspondence course from around 1917 or so.
First of all, let me say how much I enjoy the The Master Key System. I learned about it some years ago when I was initially beginning my own now-passionate journey of personal development. I got to know the work of Tony Michalski over at Kallisti Publishing, and he is truly one of today’s best known experts on Mr. Haanel’s work.
Anyway, this is an excellent visualization exercise that I would like to share with you, in hopes that it offers a little inspiration and motivation to keep moving forward.
Right now, you are currently sitting at a computer, reading this post.
Have a quick look around the room where you are sitting, and pick out an object – anything will do. A book, perhaps. Or a chair, or table – maybe even your very computer.
Now, take that object, and trace it back in time from where it is now – all the way back to its origin.
For example, the chair in the room came from a store. But before it was at the store, it was in a delivery truck. Before then, it was being painted or upholstered at the factory…
Before then, it was being pieced together… etc. Finally, it was pieces of wood, shaped from a tree which had been trucked over to the lumber mill…
Do you see how this progresses?
Finally, before that, there was a plan that had perhaps been rendered by a draftsman or furniture designer…
And finally, we get to the designer him or herself. He or she had an IDEA in mind – a thought – one way or another about a chair that would look just like the one that currently sits in your room.
The THOUGHT preceded the resulting ITEM, did it not? Someone had to first think about a chair before the chair could be produced.
It is the same with everything. EVERYTHING begins in thought – an idea. The things you are working toward – all your dreams, your goals, your objectives – all these things had to begin with a THOUGHT.
This is why thinking about what you WANT to attain (versus what you do NOT want in your life) is so critical.
This is why we emphasize getting clear about what you want to begin with. Otherwise, if you do not (or if you think only about what you do NOT want), it will be very difficult for you to take action steps toward making those goals come to pass.
And action, as we know, is how we move forward.
So, use this exercise in your own process. Think about some of the wonderful things you have already accomplished in your life, and race the results back to their origin – where they first crossed your mind to begin with.
This should give you the inspiration and faith to know that your current goals and objectives have an exciting journey ahead towards their fulfilment.
By the way: Here is a page on some categories for personal goals and motivation, if you’d like to “nudge” your brain a bit. 🙂
A little more about The Master Key System: I think that one of the reasons I enjoy Mr. Haanel’s instruction so much is that there is no “fluff” surrounding it. He is showing us how to use our minds, our imagination, and our abilities to concentrate in a concrete, step-by-step way.
If you are serious – REALLY serious about learning how to focus and use your power of concentration effectively, then I urge you to have a serious look – you can find The Master Key System at Amazon. I use a lot of personal development tools – and this is, by far, one of my favorites. Tell Tony I say hi! 🙂
PS: If, for some reason, you have not yet bought a copy of my Goal Planning Strategies Guide and newsletter, please visit my Self Development Strategies site! If you decide to buy it, I thank you!
PPS: If you would like to read another article inspired by Charles F. Haanel, here is the link => On Giving and Receiving – Inspired by Charles F. Haanel.